Damn, fam, wow, hahah, uhhā¦ š
If youāve been following along on here, you know itās been a wild few daysā¦
Shit got even weirder if you were following along on Twitter / Telegram hahahā¦
Iām not exactly sure whatās going onā¦ maybe some of you have theories you can share with me?
Basically a few days ago it felt like a ādam burstā somewhere deep in my system.
Felt like being plugged into a sparking electric socket of pure primal, raw, primordial, sexual, explosive energy.
I hadnāt taken any psychedelics in several weeks, so it wasnāt directly catalyzed by anything like that (though Iām sure my Bufo / 5-MeO initiation in recent months is a strong factor).
It seems connected to emerging from my Covid underworld-descent-rebirth journey and also being on this ridiculously charged-up volcanic island literally in the middle of the ocean. A literal fucking brief-but-house-jolting EARTHQUAKE happened a couple days ago right around the time I was feeling peak energyā¦
It also feels definitively connected to being part of Dane Tomasā 5-week Obsidian container right now, wherein weāre working with sex magick and deep shadow work. In fact it was during/after one of our digital group magick sessions last weekend that I started feeling something explosive and dragon-like begin to erupt to the surfaceā¦
And it also feels distinctly connected to consciously choosing to spend a few days away from Tanja and Lila for the first time since Lila was born almost 8 months ago. Like certain energies that donāt have space to emerge in the context of fatherhood and family life are seizing this opportunity to āexerciseā / āexorcize.ā
Iāve been reading about āKundalini awakeningā in recent months, and there seem to be some distinct overlaps there. I feel like 2018, when I first met ayahuasca, was the time when I first began experiencing intense āKundalini awakeningā-type energy releases. Maybe this is still an ongoing unfoldment of that same process. On another level all of life is an unfoldment of one process.
Presently Iāve managed to ground down somewhat. Eating meat, fish, drinking beer, bare feet on Earth, and taking showers seems to help. Let me know if you have other tips for grounding / reconnecting to Earth / reconnecting to my human self / returning deeply to my body.
I know Iāve shared some extremely intense and controversial things the past few days. In part this is a large purgeāa kind of fire-breathing-dragon-type eruption of flames that had been trapped for too long.
Sometimes I question if Iāve taken my own principle of āOpen Source Your Processā too far. I wonder if sharing this transparently on the Internet is really for the best.
Yet, when I reflect on what Iād like to see in the world, I truly wish everyone were way more transparent on the Internet and in life in general. I wish people would say what they really feel and share the raw, real shit that is really going on for everyone. This is where the juice is. This is the real, alive, intense, messy shit that this gorgeous human experience consists of. This is also a practice that has completely changed/shaped my life: Simply writing and speaking my truth. Try it, itās immeasurably life-altering, as good olā blessed archetypal-grandfather-king-ape Jordan B. Peterson loves to remind us.
Itās also just art, man. I fucking love art. I see everything I do as art. Life, business, relationships, content-creation, everything. I am an artist at heart, and it is all art. So when Iām feeling intense crazy fucking energy, my first instinct is like, āYooo, I gotta channel this into something. This is going to be fucking gonzo-bonkers-EPIC.ā
So when I reflect, Iām like yeah, nah, actually, Iām damn glad Iām sharing myself in this way. Itās not always easy. You might be stunned if you saw the countless hateful messages Iāve received over the years. A fair chunk of people hate my guts and think Iām an insane demonically-possessed cult leader or psychopath, etc. etc. And maybe on some level I am, and maybe thatās okay. ; )
Really, thoughā¦ maybe all of life, all parts of us, are okay. My view is that there is nothing in any human being that is not also in me. I quite literally see all lifetimes as my own lifetimes, all beings as other faces/expressions of me. My view is that we are all the All and we will live every single lifetime. This is the true meaning of karma: What you do to another, you do to your own self. You reap what you sow. You will have to live that lifetime too. This is why the heartās message of Love is actually the only rational/pragmatic approach: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Empower yourself and others to live the most beautiful lives possible.
Itās really the only thing that makes sense. And the only reason we donāt do it is because weāve forgotten that itās all Us. Itās all you. Every single being, every single animal, every single plant, every single star, every single broken-hearted and lonely and desperate being out there. When you start to see this, compassion is inevitable.
A Disclaimer & Love Note
Soā¦ Iām happy that I share the way I doā¦
BUTā¦
I sense that itās also time to share a disclaimer hereāsomething I probably should have done a long time ago.
I want to say that if you are in a sensitive place and the messages Iām sharing feel really intense and triggering and your heart is telling you to unsubscribe/unfollow for a while, please, please do so.
(Thereās an āunsubscribeā button at the bottom of every email I send. Youād be surprised how many people donāt realize this and email me to try to unsubscribe.)
It is not my intention to hold anyone hostage or relentlessly cross a personās boundaries to the point of making them feel wronged in any way. Not in the slightest. I assume everyone is sovereign and free and that if my stuff is too much for someone, they will simply unsubscribe and go elsewhere. Thereās a bazillion other troughs to drink from on this wide wild interwebz, after all.
But, maybe it needs to be said sometimes:
Listen to yourself. Your own heart. Above all. Always.
Donāt absorb my content if it doesnāt feel like the right stuff at the right moment for you. A lot of it is really, really intense. I have been through an insane ~12-year mystical process and sometimes I forget just how much shit Iāve actually had to go through to be able to even share the things that I do. Itās been insane. Itās really been no joke at all. I wouldnāt trade it for anything, but that doesnāt mean itās for you. My life involves the full spectrum of the human experience, including some of the wildest shit known to man. For years Iāve been doing some of the deepest mystical (shadow) work I can imagine anyone doing.
I donāt say this to boast, Iām just trying to be clear: You might not actually want this right now. You might not be ready for it. Thatās perfectly freaking beautiful, gorgeous, and okay. YOU are perfectly beautiful, gorgeous, and okay. Unspeakably so. I really canāt tell you. I love you so freaking much it makes my heart explode. Listen to this if you ever need a reminder.
You are an absolute cupcake, an absolute delicious morsel of caramel, an absolutely stunning meteor dazzling me with the glory of YOU, in all your fathomless, mysterious HUMANITY. Dear God, YOUR HUMANITY!!! It makes me want to scream and cry and weep and laugh and have a few beers with Dostoevsky and Nietzsche and just bear hug it out and wrestle and writhe and rave and moan and have explosive raging orgasms for days on end. Your humanity. Wow. WOW.
Youāre perfect. End of story. You donāt have to do anything at all. Your life is already the most beautiful work of art I could possibly imagine.
(Yet donāt use that as an excuse to not make it even more beautiful if your heart and soul are telling you to do so. : ))
So yeahā¦ again, in case I havenāt made myself clear: What I talk about is playing with fire. Quite literally stealing fire from the gods.
Psychedelics, mysticism, magick, enlightenment, non-duality, deep shadow work, activating your true power, getting radically honest about what you want and taking it, living the most epic & beautiful life imaginable to you, surrendering to God, realizing you are God (and human and everything up, down, left, right, in-between)ā¦
Yeah, this stuff is not just words. Itās utterly paradigm-shattering, life-revolutionizing stuff. No joke at all. Many people have told me over the years that simply reading my stuff changed their life and now theyāre living in another country, etc. etc. Lol. And donāt even get me started on the people who take things a step further and come to my retreats and join my (digital) containers and such: Iāve been witnessing miracles and total life-revolutions and full-blown activations for years now. This shit is real.
And itās getting even more real. The intensity is rising. Because my power is rising. More of it is being activated, ongoingly. Thatās why each successive container I create is more powerful than the last. And now that this latest activation has happened these past few days, I can feel a whole new level dropping in. Literally, this feels like one of the biggest paradigm shifts / quantum leaps / rebirths Iāve experienced, and Iāve experienced a whole hell of a lot of them. Like, this is a new octave, a new harmonic, a new order of magnitude.
So, justā¦ be careful, kid. A lot of you are sorta like younger versions of me. And I kinda wish someone had told me exactly what Iām telling you now: Itās really no joke, what youāre getting yourself into. Like really, really, really no joke. You cannot possibly know what exactly youāre getting yourself into. You cannot know what youāre playing with, until you know. And by then, thereās no turning back. If in your heart of hearts this is what you want in *this lifetime*, nothing will be able to keep you away. But be utterly honest with yourself: Is this really for you? Are you wanting to go all the way with this?
Because once you cross certain thresholds, thereās no turning back.
The process *takes you*.
The abyss takes you.
Death takes you.
God takes you.
More Raw Honesty Because It Feels Good
Phew, Iāve gotten some chills a few times while writing this, so I know itās good stuff, lol. Damn, honesty feels amazing.
Hereās some more honesty: Iāve been scared at times the past few days. Iāve felt fear about what is happening to me. Fear of losing control. Fear of going insane. Fear of being ābipolar.ā Fear of losing my family. Last night I walked to a restaurant and I started feeling so much pressure in my head that I thought I was going to pass out. I was having a damn difficult time grounding and thank God I made it and got some meat and fish and beer in my body. Blessings to the animals that gave their lives for that delicious meal. Alpacu-sunchis ā an indigenous word I typically say before eating meat that signifies, āOne day I too will return to become the Earth.ā
This type of stuff is par for the course. Iāve gone through some absolutely terrifying processes the past few years. Like, fuckinā A, dawg, WOW, shit got fucking RATCHET and HECTIC at times. Like in 2019 when the shaman-goddess I was romantically involved with broke up with me right before an ayahuasca retreat and I recorded The Pain Body Freestyles and then I still went to the retreat anyway and the woman I was wildly in love with served me TALL glasses of STRONG Shipibo ayahuasca four nights in a row and things got dark as fuck and I was terrified and sobbing and vomiting for hours on end before finally breaking through into the most unimaginably beautiful God-Light and BEING nothing but that Peace-Love-Light and knowing I was that Eternal Light forevermore and knowing no one could ever hurt me unless I gave them permissionā¦
Sometime I should write that full story, because it was absolutely fucking INSANE. Wildest weeks of my life. It was on that retreat that the name āGoku the Wizard Kingā came to meāI felt like I literally had to āgo Super Saiyanā and remember vastly more of my true God-Power just to survive that retreat. It was also there that I met the legendary Jonathan MacCaul, who angelically held space at that time for perhaps the most volcanic eruption/clear/exorcism of my lifeāliteral lifetimes of trapped pain and agony and sorrow and trauma screaming forth from my body as I writhed and spit and āJBā was nowhere to be found and my voice changed into a Gandalf-like old man who was shouting things like, āYOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!ā and āYOU DO NOT KNOW WHO I AM. I AM THOTH. I AM HERMES. I AM ZARATHUSTRA. I HAVE TRAVELED INFINITE OMNIVERSES.ā
Yeahā¦ Shit got fucking multi-dimensionally WACKY, bro. Like what in the actual fuck was that. I had no idea shit like that existed, just a small-town kid from Iowa humming along in the universe then BAM, next thing you know Iām in the thick of some sort of multi-dimensional war for the soul of humanity??? And people get mad at me on the Internet for sharing a few intense WORDS??? Theyāre just fucking words, bitch. GTFO. Go taste some real shit and get back to me.
Ahem, apologies, got a little spicy again for a moment there.
So yeah, brothers, sisters, I hope that gives you a visceral taste of just a smidgeon of what Iāve gone through the past years. Iāve literally been traveling the world non-stop since 2013 when I moved to Asia at age 22, and JAYSUS H. CHRIST MAN, there have been some wild adventures. Maybe I should write a memoir / autobiography soon. Might be about time to record some of those stories.
In Sumā¦
ANYWHO, I think thatās about enough from me for now.
Iām excited about what is to come. Lotta visions coming through right now. Iāve also created some other extremely rare and raw and honest artifacts the past couple days, and Iāll probably share those on the Internet too soonish, plus maybe a couple other things Iāve created in the past that I didnāt share because they were so raw. It feels like now is a moment to āclean out my closetā and really just put it all out there. Well, maybe not ALL of it just yet. š Not sure the world and I are ready for that, and I gotta keep āem guessinā a little bitā¦ ; )
Hereās another probably-triggering-for-many thing I made in the past couple days, a new song called BITCH IāM A GOD, lol, yes that happened:
Thank you for reading. Thank you for existing. I love you. I really do. You are me and I am you. Love and blessings always to you and yours.
In Heart-Led Power and Truth,
J
P.S. I have now decided to make the OUROBOROS DRAGON POWER FAM on Telegram (formerly āOuroboros Soul Familyā) a closed/private group that is accessible only by invitation or by becoming a paid subscriber here on Substack. Thereās been some WILD SHIT going down in that group the past few days; I definitely went a little spazzy, lolā¦ Become a paid subscriber here if youād like to get access to the group with 117 of us who are there now and unlock the full experience here on Substack.
(Who chose the name āSubstack,ā by the way? That shit is like the lamest word Iāve ever heard. Someone tell them to dream up something that doesnāt suck and matches the epicness of their blogging platform.)
P.P.S. Thereās still time to join us in BE YOU! We still have five more live Sunday sessions + likely some epic bonus sessions.
P.P.P.S. Paid subscribers aka POWER FAM, read on for a message for your eyes only, Iām gonna try to start making these bonus transmissions EXTRA JUICY / RAW / REAL / SEXY / HONEST, here we goā¦
Dear POWER FAM,
GOD DAMN ITāS REALLY BEEN A CRAZY AND SEXUAL FEW DAYSā¦
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