Whip Me, Daddy: Enlightenment & Existential Perversion
Why we're totally FUCKED and it's the best news ever
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A couple weeks ago, I attended a digital Zoom satsang with Peter Brown. (He hosts these weekly and they’re free and open to all.) During this satsang, I experienced a powerful Opening — a deepening of Realization of my True Nature. It was an incredibly beautiful and relieving deepening into the meaning of “Changelessness.” The next day, I wrote this piece, attempting to transmit the essence of the Opening.
When Life has us nailed…
When we feel at the end of our rope…
When we just want to be “anywhere but here”…
When we’re feeling all the resistance and contraction…
When we just wish we could “snap out of it”…
That is an exceedingly powerful opportunity to notice that…
There’s nowhere to get to.
Nowhere to go.
Nothing to do.
No one to be.
Not in the sense of, “Just chill, you don’t have to go anywhere or do anything or be anyone right now”…
No…
Rather, in the sense that you CANNOT go anywhere or do anything or be anyone.
Not really…
The Essential You…
The True You…
CANNOT go anywhere, do anything, be anyone…
It can pretend to, sure…
But in its ESSENCE…
Does it ever actually change at all?
No.
In any moment, you can ask these questions:
Where am I?
Who am I?
What am I doing?
If you look extremely closely at your reality, you will see that the answer is always the same:
I am nowhere.
I am no one.
I am doing no-thing.
No-thing is happening.
On the level of human definitions and reference points, of course this sounds like pure nonsense.
And on that level, it is nonsense.
On that level, I’m JB, in Germany, typing an article on my Macbook.
The human level is gorgeous, intimate poetry to be cherished and revered.
The human level is real too, as far as it goes.
But there is something ‘More Real’ than that.
(Even though it’s all ultimately nothing other than the Real.)
There is a Fundamental You that preceded the ‘Big Bang.’
There is a Fundamental You that will be there when the stars burn themselves out.
When infinite universes collapse into nothingness, there You will be, stainless and immutable, as it ever was and shall be.
That You is here now.
Unknown Infinity is here now.
It’s actually the only ‘thing’ that can really and truly be said to actually be here.
Even as It expresses itself in infinite ways, being the endlessly bejeweled forms which are made of It and which kaleidoscopically rise and fall away within It…
It never departs from itself.
It never actually changes one iota.
Nothing actually happens to it.
Like water to fish, it is the invisible ether through which we swim, of which our world is made.
Except in our case…
It is absolutely and perfectly still.
Even as vibrations of every imaginable variety erupt within It, as It…
It is unmoving.
Immutable Silence.
The world is made of Immutable Silence.
——
When Life has us nailed…
When we desperately wish for things to change…
Therein lies the opportunity of a lifetime.
The opportunity to remember the Changeless.
In a state of utter hopelessness…
We are ripe for the remembrance of That Which Has No Need For Hope.
That which simply and eternally and irrevocably IS.
As we toss and turn and writhe and scream and beg and plead and twist and yearn and struggle and climb and fall and fight and live and die…
All the while IT *IS*.
*NOTHING* we do can *EVER* change that Fact.
We are *UTTERLY POWERLESS* to change this Fact.
The only Fact in existence…
IT *IS*.
Hah-hah-hah-hah-hah!!!!!
Holy Fuck!!!!!
IT *IS*.
Imagine those words on a billboard the size of the multiverse…
IT *IS*.
Fuck!!!!!
What a cosmic joke…
That the sole Fact of existence…
The most profound and precious diamond of realization…
Can be summarized with supreme potency in just two two-letter words.
IT *IS*.
IT *IS*.
IT *IS*.
IT *IS*.
IT *IS*.
IT *IS*.
IT *IS*.
And yet…
These two words can’t help you much…
‘Till you see for yourself THAT to which they point.
So, if you want to, look closely and see.
——
I’m really quite flabbergasted right now…
By how RIDICULOUS we are.
By how I’ve spent the last few months in so much pain and fear, groping and grasping and hoping and panicking…
And all the while…
IT *WAS*.
IT *IS*.
IT *EVER SHALL BE*.
I don’t know how to capture this feeling in words.
The utter futility and pointlessness of our suffering.
Why do we do it to ourselves???
Where is the EXISTENTIAL KINK???
It’s definitely there. We must really and truly and masochistically LOVE the drama, on some level…
We MUST be EXISTENTIAL PERVERTS!!!!!
“OH YEAH, WHIP ME, DADDY!!!!!”
Makes things a lot more interesting, I guess…
But eventually…
When we get tired of suffering so much…
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